Wednesday, August 3, 2011

Wednesday - Focused

It is so strange. What happens to me after an event of any kind. It doesn't matter if is a happy occassion or a sad one. It doesn't matter if it is laughter or the sounds of feet walking and the glare of florescent lights. What causes my brain going into neutral varies slightly. I can go to the grocery store when there aren't many people there on a partly cloudy day and get home and after a little break, paint or write. But if there is any confusion or if it is real sunny and windy and I forgot my wrap around glasses and ear plugs then I could be out of focus for hours, maybe until the next day.

It's like my brain goes into neutral. At first I am unaware of it. I may nap, which I rarely do. Or the canvas I was so excited to work on get neglected for a day or two. It often happens after a speaking engagement. I can have a great experience and meet delightful people and be so happy. And then get home and in a little while this blankness comes into my head, like an unwelcomed guest and it stays there. After awhile I remember oh, this happens after a busy day or an event. Nothing to worry about. But it always scares me. I'm always afraid that I will get lost in that nothingness and not find my way back.

What is cool is how Coco adapts to these lulls in focus and energy. She leans up against me or lays across my feet and just stays with me. Usually, we take at least one nice long walk and on a good day we even take two. She's a good strong three year old akita. She needs the exercise, we both do. But the way she just goes with the flow is so wonderful. Right now she is laying across my feet.

Well!! Today I am back in focus and it feels great. I'm about ready to get to my canvases and hope to have a good day of work ahead. After I spoil Coco and we go for a walk.

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